Happiness is overrated

How many times have you taken the time to really ask yourself what happiness means to you? Or when was the last time you were happy... like truly happy? I will answer for myself, none, nunca, never.

Being happy is so simple, we say it all the time, we live to be happy yet we never really stop to think about it. When my therapists asked me to answer those questions I had a brain fart (classy, I know). I won't go in detail about our therapy session but it ended with me saying "I am happy" and her asking "are you truly happy or are you just content?." I went into therapy that day thinking I was fine and left with another existential crisis to say the least.

Now this is what I figured out, a lot of us are guilty of having used or using the word "happiness" or "being happy" incorrectly.

We tend to say we are happy when we are doing something out of the ordinary, traveling, hanging out with friends, going on a date, doing an extreme sport, you name it, just anything external. I hate to break it to you but that feeling those things give you is actually just excitement. Happiness is NOT excitement.

If you are still reading this, I want you to really think about what I am about to say. If you think you are truly happy when you are being the life of the party, being crazy, hanging out with friends, laughing, or high, you will always feel some emptiness. If your definition of being happy requires you to be externally stimulated and excited, your happiness eventually will always fade away and it isn't healthy.

A lot of us have been guilty of basing our happiness off of external things but that makes us vulnerable and can take a toll on our mental health. Something that many people have yet to understand is that they should strive for a state of being and not just a fleeting feeling.

What I want all of my loved ones and all of the people I come in contact with to understand, is that there is nothing more fulfilling than learning to be at peace with yourself. The best way I can explain this is by telling you about the time I felt that way. Are you ready?

Truth to be told, the last time I felt genuine peacefulness was last night. I feel it when every night I go to bed and can acknowledge everything I did and did not do that day and fall asleep feeling peaceful, calm, and fulfilled because regardless of what happened, it was a good day and I did what I thought was right.

After some thought, I realized there's something better than happiness:

A feeling of peace, calm, and contentment with whatever is happening now (not the future, not the past) and with no external stimulation.

I wish I could just magically help everyone feel this way but the reality is that at the end of the day you have to choose and teach yourself how to be content with everything you are, everything you have, and everything you do.

Here is JUST A THOUGHT of mine:

This is one of the hardest things for us humans to understand and even I can't remind myself of this a hundred percent of the time but life is NOT a roller coaster. We choose to make life a roller coaster with every decision we make, most of the time we are the ones that make ourselves unhappy because we allow the bad things and negative thoughts to overpower us, to be bigger than all the blessings in our lives and take our peace away.

Being mindful, optimistic, and grateful is essential to finding contentment within yourself.

In my humble opinion, happiness is overrated and maybe we should all be striving to be content.

Despite popular belief "content" does not mean to settle, content is simply a state of peaceful happiness. I strongly believe that one can be content and grateful with ones life while still having goals and the desire to be better.

#mentalhealth #happiness #contentment #understanding